Beautiful post! I think we spend far to much of our life energy worrying about what others say (not say) & do (not do.) Part of the gift of life is the ability to be fully present for it. If we're too busy giving our attention and focus away on another person, we lose the gift.
Gdub
· 11 months ago
That is very true. I find it awe-inspiring to consider the miracle of agency. We have such great power over our lives. Giving away that power seems absurd.
A quick question, which I've been struggling with:
How do you simultaneously invest in others while taking care to not neglect your needs?
MayankDhingra
· 12 months ago
First things first, I am glad that this is not a post on social media.
The problem that you've mentioned is quite common and the examples you've cited are quite real. Almost everyone runs into a similar situation be it in personal life or professional and invariably most of us end up feeling bad for expecting wrong things.
I am in agreement with you on this and I too upto a large extent try to figure out the concerned person's intent rather than solely relying on their words. People invariably leave some dots if what they are saying is different from what they are thinking/feeling/doing and once you connect these dots you can understand the bigger picture. If I find some differences in the said word and action before reaching a conclusion I try to convey how I feel to the other person just to be sure there isn't anything which I didn't know/think. It helps.
Its good to acknowledge certain things and accept the truth instead of living in illusions only to get hurt later.
Gdub
· 11 months ago
Thanks for the insight Mayank!
It's amazing how helpful it is to explain yourself to a person and seek to define the issue rather than leave it up in the air and hope for a better outcome tomorrow. Our fear of confrontation seems to be one of our largest human stumbling blocks.
Looking for a roommate
· 11 months ago
Couldn’t be written any better. Reading this post reminds me of my old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this article to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!
All Comments
A quick question, which I've been struggling with:
How do you simultaneously invest in others while taking care to not neglect your needs?
The problem that you've mentioned is quite common and the examples you've cited are quite real. Almost everyone runs into a similar situation be it in personal life or professional and invariably most of us end up feeling bad for expecting wrong things.
I am in agreement with you on this and I too upto a large extent try to figure out the concerned person's intent rather than solely relying on their words. People invariably leave some dots if what they are saying is different from what they are thinking/feeling/doing and once you connect these dots you can understand the bigger picture. If I find some differences in the said word and action before reaching a conclusion I try to convey how I feel to the other person just to be sure there isn't anything which I didn't know/think. It helps.
Its good to acknowledge certain things and accept the truth instead of living in illusions only to get hurt later.
It's amazing how helpful it is to explain yourself to a person and seek to define the issue rather than leave it up in the air and hope for a better outcome tomorrow. Our fear of confrontation seems to be one of our largest human stumbling blocks.